Last Day of Chemo

Wednesday, December 27, Ryan received his last bag of chemo for this round. So far, he feels okay and is counting these days as blessings, especially with doctors warning him the tough days will be here soon enough. Every good day is one less bad day.

12/26/2017 Thoughts from the past week

I am glad to have a week behind me!  It wasn't the easiest week for my mind, but I am grateful it wasn't so bad physically.  It was hard to be here in the hospital over Christmas, but I made it through.  I will admit I did shed a tear from time to time wishing I was with my family celebrating the holiday.  Several people told me that with today's technology it will be easier because I can Skype, FaceTime, Snapchat, etc and feel like I was a part of the celebration.  In reality it wasn't that way at all.  Seeing friends' and family's social media posts made it even harder because I saw exactly what I was missing.  I often found myself pushing the emotions aside and keeping my focus on the big picture. I have had visitors everyday since I have been admitted which helps pass the time greatly. I have spent a lot of time walking laps around the "Unit" trying to do at least 14 laps, which translates to a mile walk.  The walking helps clear my mind and it makes my body feel good.  I have been using all this time I have to do a lot of thinking.  I been working on my relationship with God and trying to mend the struggles of the past that I felt were because of Him.  Many people that know me well know that I do believe in God, but I was not His best example of faith.  With help from Fr. MacDonald, my sister Shannon, and even a message from a childhood friend, I am beginning to understand what He does and is doing now.  I know this all seem so weird coming form me, but this experience in my life has really made me take a look at my faith and the lack of understanding I have had over the years.  I even went to confession for the first time in over 20 years.  There was something inside me that told me there isn't anyway I was going to pull through this without the Lord on my side.  I have to say opening my heart back up to God was the best choice I've made.  I have felt more at ease in the last weeks than I can remember in a long time.  I also have to say all the messages on Facebook have warmed my heart more than anyone will ever know.  I promise I have read each and every message that has been left and I thank you for taking the time to offer your support and encouragement.  I will eventually respond to the people that left me a PM as soon as I have a moment to respond with the attention they gave to me. Sorry this update is so off the wall for me, but this has been my week.  I really dont have much to update in the sense of the cancer.  We are still waiting to see if the Chemo has worked accordingly.  The Doctors have told me all my labs are exactly what they want to see.  My body is handing the Chemo nicely and without any serious complications.  I will have a bone marrow biopsy on Monday next week and this will tell us if I am in remission for AML.  If I am indeed in remission, I will get to go home for a couple of weeks and take oral chemo to give my body a break before we start round 2 of Chemo for the transplant.

A Change of Plans

Monday's blood work showed that the cancer blasted, which doctors were hoping to avoid. Since things are progressing as a faster pace,on Tuesday they admitted Ryan so they could begin chemo as soon as possible. Tuesday night was rough. Ryan's spleen is enlarged and causing some discomfort. He kept getting sick throughout the night while receiving premeds.
The plan is for Ryan to receive 7 days of chemo. He thought maybe he's be in the hospital for a month, go home for a week, then return to begin the transplant process.

This is just a detour on his road to recovery.

Ryan seems to be in good spirits and is still "himself" today...

A Week Before Admission

Monday, Dec 18: Ryan spent all day (8:30AM to 5:30PM) getting platelets before 2 other procedures. The hospital took over two hours to get platelets that are stored in the same building, which can be frustrating. Because Ryan's white cell count is so high, they had to order platelets without white cells. Tomorrow will be more of the same. All this prepping so the medicine can do what it does and God can take care of the rest!

Ryan decided to show off his new piercings:

A Prayer for Cancer Healing

Prayer for Cancer Healing

Loving Father, I come before you trusting in your goodness, kindness
and the power of your healing love as I lift up to you my sickness.

Heal me, Lord, of my Leukemia.
Lord, you know all things, you can do all things and I know you love me very much.
Only you know what is best for me and what I need in terms of healing.

As I sit before you now lay your hands upon me, touch me,
heal me and bring me wholeness of body, mind, emotions and spirit.
Let the grace of your divine love and power flow to me right now to reach the
inner recesses of my being and spread to the different parts of my body.

Take away any pain or feeling of discomfort.
Correct any malfunctioning of my bodily organs and tissues.
Melt with the heat of your healing love all abnormal and cancerous growths.
Arrest the further spreading of those sick cells and create in me new and healthy cells.
Root out all the hurts embedded in my subconscious through the years.

Heal all my feelings of rejection, anger, frustration, aggravation,
all painful memories of the past and repercussions of traumatic experiences.
As you root out all these hurts, fill that void with your spirit of love, peace
and understanding, acceptance, meekness and tenderness, kindness, concern and generosity.

As I completely surrender to you my cancer sickness, deliver me from dwelling
on self-pity, fears, anxieties, hopelessness and all negative thoughts, and give me
the grace to offer all my pains and sufferings for other suffering people like me,
especially those sick with cancer, with no one to support them and pray for them.

Help me to see the blessings out of each trial to realize each victory from every tear,
to see your guiding hand and feel your loving presence in everything that is
happening to me, confident that you are totally in control.

Help me to learn lessons from my mistakes of the past,
and work on changes in my life and my way of living.
And then, dearest Lord, after I have been healed may my life be a witness to your love,
peace and healing power for others and bring glory, honor and praise to you.

All these I pray in the name of Jesus, through the intercession of Mary
and all the saints and angels.

Amen.

Where to Begin: A Facebook Update

Thank you everyone for all the kind words, prayers and support! For those that don’t know the details....

I have been fighting cancer again since late September. I was being treated with 2 oral chemo therapies, blood and platelet transfusions, biopsies and labs. At one point in November we thought it was beat but it decided to come back. In the last couple weeks my cancer continues to become more aggressive and I am reaching a critical point. By the true grace of God, I will start chemo therapy Christmas Morning and receive a Bone Marrow Transplant on January 2nd. I will spend 30 days in isolation at the hospital and 70 days in isolation at home. This is to prevent illness and infection.

My brother Sean McDonnell will be my donor! Thank God my parents had so many children! I had a 25% chance of a positive match with each sibling. We were told that it can take months to find a match if none of my siblings were a match. Sean was in the very first group of 4 siblings being tested and matched. He was actually a rare match. He matched the 10 markers in my DNA perfectly, his blood type matched, and we both test negative for a virus that 70% of the population carries. We were told this doesn’t happen for anybody and that we were truly lucky. I believe gods hands were behind these results but I also believe Sean brought luck. He is the 7th [son] born on the 7th day of May in an Irish family....☘️

I will eventually have a blog that will be kept up to date with my progress. I will post a link once it is ready... Again THANK YOU for your support and please keep the prayers coming!